I would never consider myself a funny person. I have my moments, but most of the time I’m not what you would call funny. I work with funny people, who have comedic timing, which I’m very thankful for. But I’ve never been able to be one of those myself.
Probably because I take a near-morbid interest in bad jokes. Really bad ones. Like this one...
Once upon a time there existed a valley, and in this valley lived a race of people called the Trids. The Trids were a hungry folk, because food did not grow well in the valley.
The mountains surrounding the valley were abundant with food, but were also populated by a race of Giants. Whenever the Trids climbed the mountains looking for food, the Giants would kick them back down into the valley.
One day, after a long time of being very hungry, a Rabbi passed through the valley. The Trids, desperately hungry, thought that maybe the Giants wouldn’t hurt a Rabbi, and asked the Rabbi if he could gather food for the Trids.
The Rabbi agreed and climbed the mountain. He found the fruit and vegetables, and was able to gather food without any trouble. The Giants left him completely alone.
After the Rabbi had brought the food down to the Trids (to much fanfare), the puzzled Rabbi promptly climbed back up the mountain, went to the first Giant he could find, and asked:
"Why do you kick Trids down the mountain when they come looking for food, but you let me gather all I can carry?"
The Giant looked at the Rabbi, smiled, and said:
"Silly Rabbi... kicks are for Trids."
I told you it was bad.
It also makes no sense out of North America, unless you’ve happened to see the commercials upon which this joke was based.